Did you miss me? I missed you! Yes, it's been a while. It doesn't mean that posts haven't been happening....Just mostly in my head. Time to get the fingers moving on the keyboard and put it out there.
Life is still busy. It's actually the busiest time of year for us. Regardless of how busy we are, we still need to eat. 3 meals a day. Every day....
With four kids' individual personalities, their food preferences follow suit. One point is that their preferences are a moving target. It has been said that you need to put a food in front of a kid hundreds of times before you can expect them to eat it. What about the opposite. What happens when you have a child who eats a food and then stops? How much does peer pressure have to do with "likes" and "dislikes"? How does one meal plan around all of these factors.
Child #1, with parents who knew nothing, was a pretty agreeable eater as a small child. He had his quirks, but ate fruits, vegetables, meat, dairy, etc. No issues. Until he gave up all fruits and vegetables. ALL. Well, not quite all. Apples and bananas were it. Around 1st grade he added lettuce to his repertoire of things he'd eat, thanks to the school garden and a gallon of ranch dressing. Then came the tips of broccoli and avocado with ketchup. I don't think enough nutrients from the vegetables entered his system, but it was better than nothing.
Apples and bananas began to wane and then his sisters started to LOVE fruit. The smell, sight or mention of the fruit would send him into a tizzy. My patience began to wane along with all fruits and vegetables. His extreme persistence in not eating these foods was so annoying. I cooked with home made broths and we ate a lot of salad. I lectured and yelled. Speaking negatively about food they were served was a punishable offense. The main issue that was arising was that his littlest sister, #4, was starting to mimic him.
#4 was the slowest, pickiest eater in the world. She would fall asleep eating, it would take her so long. Her tastes were different. Due to low weight, she had extra supplements of cod liver oil and homemade formula. As she got older, she would eat anything mixed with the oil, but imitate her brother's refusal for most other things. If she ate after 3PM, she would not eat dinner. I was told that 2 good meals were good enough. Boy did she try my patience.
#2 eats EVERYTHING. I'm not joking. She tells me when there is something she doesn't like, but says that she doesn't want to hurt my feelings and eats it anyway. As much as she was trying to emulate her brother in most other areas of her life, thank goodness eating wasn't one of them.
#3 eats almost everything. She eats all fruits and vegetables along with most meals. She also likes to help cook. Shelling an extra large bag of peas is exciting. Payment is being able to eat them along the way.
That was then, this is now.....
Just because some of my kids didn't like fruits or vegetables didn't mean I didn't serve them. We converted, as a family, to eating family meals together every night. This meant I was eating what the kids did. The kids were served more diverse foods and things they hadn't seen or liked before. Tantrums ensued, but I pursued. First #1 accepted onions in his food. Then #1 and #2 started favoring spicy foods. Seasoning became fun. They fought over the pepper grinder. #1 became open to eating bell peppers. In his mind it was because they had the word pepper in them, so they were related to pepper. This is where I knew it was a mental thing. Really, as you and I know, bell peppers have nothing to do with pepper! I mean, come on! A small victory happened here.
Fast forward a year of refused meals, picking vegetables out of mixed meals, and so on. #1 had dinner at a friend's house. His next request floored me. Could I please make broccolini and make sure it was well done. Um, yah, of course I could. In the same week I made a meal that had butternut squash and chard in it. I figured squash tasted similar to the sweet potatoes he ate during Thanksgiving. I must confess that I was playing on the fact he was colorblind. I figured the chard would look brown and blend in with other parts. I didn't count on him reading the recipe as I cooked. He ate it anyway. A few days later I made a yummy dish that included mushrooms. He started to eat around them. I asked him to think about trying them since he'd really been liking what I'd been making that week. He ate them and said "mmmm, not bad". #4 was watching him.
Within a week or two, my picky-never touched/looked at-eater had quadrupled his vegetable repertoire. I felt so accomplished. Who am I kidding though? It had taken over 6 years of struggles and trials. I had never been in the position of working so long without a plan, trying to do the best I could. Lucky for all of us that I am more stubborn than my children. I know they get it from me, but for now, I hold the title.
What came next.....
Kale! It wasn't far off from chard or broccolini. I overcooked it, like the boy enjoyed. We ALL enjoyed it. Now, we have salad, maybe once a week and the kids fight over the rest of the kale chips. Last night he even ate tomatoes on his sandwich. I hope it doesn't take 6 years to get #4 on board.
How much of our success was maturity? Probably lots. Both mine and the kids. We are enjoying finding new favorite meals together. I am so thankful we did not give up. I am a believer. Keep serving it, but not forcing it. We have switched to family style. Take what you will eat and you can always have more. Say nothing if you don't like it. We ask the kids to try each item but don't battle. If they don't care for dinner, they don't get a second cup of milk. The only thing we allow to be eaten other than dinner is bananas. We are also thankful that our friends eat similarly to us. We cannot control what our kids eat or are offered when not at home. The kids trade and share lunches and snacks at school. They learn to articulate their likes and dislikes when friend's parents offer foods. They are exposed to things we may not eat. Once again, it takes a village.
Now, I'm hungry, what's for dinner?!
Showing posts with label food. Show all posts
Showing posts with label food. Show all posts
Wednesday, May 2, 2012
Friday, February 11, 2011
I'm your mother
A few weeks ago we witnessed a boy speaking out in taekwondo class. Sensei's response was that he was not the boy's friend or father and that he needed to show respect. Last night, my son said to me, while imitating Sensei's tone, "I'm not your friend or father, I'm your mother." He was joking at the time, but I know the mother he was referring to. The one he has that bursts out yelling commands and demands. If I don't want my kids to yell at each other, why do I yell at them? When I don't yell, I talk and am accused of talking too much on subjects the kids want to go away.
I write about this because it makes me think. We are not our kids' friends, but are their parents. There is a difference. I once read in a book (right now I can't remember which one) that you are not doing a good job if your kids aren't mad at you. At the same time, I follow a lovely blog by an awesome pediatric doctor, Essential Parenting. He encourages a wise and loving heart for parenting. To be honest, I think both are right. I have a hard time balancing between the two.
This past week, I was tired and cranky. Hubby was out of town for 2 nights. The kids were on a roll with not listening. I had to ask several times for the mundane tasks of getting ready for bed or shoes on in the morning. I had already lectured the kids in the car about how they needed to help mommy at home. Everyone said okay. Well, I'm sure you can guess, they weren't doing any better when we got home with their listening. I managed to make dinner and the kids all got their homework done. A few more reminders at dinner and during work time with promises of compliance going forward. Ha ha ha. Post dinner they needed to go potty and brush their teeth. That's it. I was clearing the kitchen and heard a ruckus. All four of them were messing around in the girls' room. Fighting, playing and plain not listening to my requests or demands. "That's it!" I screamed. "All of your Halloween candy is going in the garbage!" Their screams and cries of "Noooo! Noooo!" followed. #1 finally hopped into the long awaiting shower. The rest sobbed in their beds and blamed others for their behavior. "It's not fair," they complained. I told them they were right since they had promised me something they couldn't deliver. That wasn't fair. I also ask them to show me with actions, not words. I appreciate an apology, but only when the behavior is changed to I relish it.
Truth be told, I was looking for a way to reverse the hoarding of Halloween candy. I had been threatening it's demise for weeks and finally had followed through. With this, I stated that we would no longer save any candy. If you got candy from school or a party, you were to eat it all in that day. For Halloween, they will be allowed to eat themselves sick and have one night of gluttony during a movie night closely following Halloween. Pfew, got that out of the way. They seemed kind of excited in the challenge of eating everything when they got it. But, I digress.....
The day after the great purge, I took a shower. Upon getting out of the shower I noticed some words written in the mirror (another peeve of mine). "I hate you." Well, I guess I accomplished my kids not liking me by the looks of that statement. #1 is 10 and I have a diary as proof that I felt the same way towards my mother for various reasons at about the exact same age. Maybe I should buy him a diary so he doesn't mess up my mirrors.
So, which comes first? A tired, cranky mom or kids who don't listen. Chris has a point in Essential Parenting that we lead with our energy. I guess my goal should be to get more sleep to be less cranky. Then maybe my kids would listen without reminders?!
Monday, February 7, 2011
what's for dinner?!
We've come a long way baby. Long ago, pre kids, we enjoyed cooking. We cooked elaborate meals, shopped on the fly, entertained on a whim. I envisioned cooking every day I was on maternity leave. Hmmm, reality set in. I could manage to bake a batch of cookies, because that was what I was craving, but complex meals went by the wayside.
Kids happened and we cooked for them. When they hit the solid food stage, I would make a weeks' worth of baby food, using every pan and surface in the kitchen. Hubby would clean up the war zone. This was our teamwork to get this accomplished. With this, our kids ate the best, most local and homemade food. Hubby would come home post work when I was on leave and would cook the 2 of us a nice meal. We would shop at the farmers' market on Saturdays and make whatever looked good, with no real plan. Once I went back to work, I still let hubby do the dinner cooking. We'd peruse cookbooks, but with little ones abound, cooking together was a thing of the past. We'd eat when the kids went to bed after 7.
Then I stopped working and had to prepare meals for 3 (and then 4) kids 3 meals a day. There was no way with dad working and not home until 7 that the kids could get to bed by 7 without feeding them at 5. I had basic, staple meals I'd feed them. Sausage, gnocchi and broccoli was an example of this. When #4 developed chronic fluid in her ears, she had to go on baby solid food and I started to make her formula from scratch. The recipe was from the Nourishing Traditions cookbook by Sally Fallon. I'd separate the whey from the yogurt, purchased lactose and a zillion other things whipping this formula up 2 times a week. You see, the doctor wanted #4 on food and not formula. She needed to gain weight. But my life, the life of a mom with 3 other kids 5 and under could not sustain a baby that couldn't eat on the run. Hence the formula. She outgrew her ear issue and the formula. Now I had 4 kids eating the same meals.
Sounds simple, but we were still shopping for kids' food and parent meals as separate menus. We were not paying attention to cost. Most especially since we paid a lot by cash at the farmers' market, and charged our way everywhere else. Then one year, I recapped our spending and saw what we had spent at our local Whole Foods Market. Yes we are a family of 6, but ignorance is no excuse. We also were buying prepared foods from Three Stone Hearth. It was cooked food that just needed heating up, made the way we'd make dinner so long ago. Saving time had a price and we had to cut back. We also had to cut back eating out. When I was pregnant, we'd do takeout a couple of times a week. We replaced it with the Three Stone Hearth, but it was starting to add up. When the 6 of us eat in a restaurant, it was totaling close to $100. Yikes.
At about that time, I came across a 13 week meal planning cookbook Supper's on the Table, Come Home by Rachel Masters. 13 weeks of home cooked meals including shopping lists. The food was simple and quick including vegetables, entree and a starch. There was a bit too much condensed soup, velveeta and religion interspersed in the recipes and book for my taste, but I managed to substitute and ignore what I didn't want. We cooked through the entire 13 weeks along with a friend who did the same week by week. We'd compare notes and laugh at our mis-steps. I often missed the parts that said something needed to cook in the crock-pot all day or should be started at 4, not 5:30 to marinade or some silly other little detail. The beauty of this process was that every week I knew what I needed to purchase to make 5 good meals. We'd end up with left overs and an impromptu dinner out here or there. The other great thing was that I started eating with the kids. Due to extra curricular activities, the kids were staying up a tad later, so they were eating at a more normal adult time. Hubby would make it home eventually and join us in progress or reheat. The kids started to have some favorite meals.
I'd never been able to figure out how my mom had made family dinners every night with all of us eating together. This is probably partially because I don't necessarily remember when I was little, like my kids' ages. She cooked awesome meals for us with variety and love. I was on the verge.
Once the 13 weeks were up my friend and I decided to make our own 13 weeks. We called it our cookbook adventure. We sifted through years and years of collected recipes torn out of papers and magazines. We threw out all of the ones that took longer than an hour to prepare and sorted the keepers into meat types, side dishes, vegetables and soups. We planned 13 weeks of variety with 5 meals a week. We varied the meats and types of meals, trying to include a crock-pot dish per week. There was less usage of condensed soup and no velveeta. We copied and spiral bound the collection. Since these recipes were untested, it was an adventure for sure.
This led my friend and I to create our own 3-ring binders of recipes that worked for our families. Armed with a box of sheet protectors, I pulled all of our family favorites into this binder. It is now separated by meat, rice, pasta, soups, breakfasts, snacks and desserts. I've been known to let the kids peruse the book and pick a recipe for the coming week. This gave at least one kid per meal ownership of what we were having.
At the same time, I began budgeting our groceries for the first time ever. I tracked for years our spending, but never recapped it. I looked back on all of our spending and picked a weekly average number. This amount included eating out and everything but cash spending that had been recorded in our tracking. Each week, on Sunday, we'd pick out 5 nights of meals from the book. Well, it wasn't just from the book. I follow several food blogs (smitten kitchen, lynns kitchen adventures and dinner a love story) and print out recipes I see that look like they'd fit for us. I swing those into our weeks and the ones we like move to the binder. I've even taken to printing on 3-hole punched paper to bypass the sheet protector step.
Things I've learned are that planning one meal as a family is infinitely easier and less expensive than separate kid meals. It also provides less wasted food. Shopping farmers' markets gives us the freshest food possible and enables us to carry meals over to the next week if we don't eat 5 meals. It has simplified our shopping, making it more efficient. I've also learned that we can do more with less. I've cut our budget by 20% and am now trying to squeeze it down another 5-10%. This is without sacrificing quantity or quality.
...to be continued with further conversation about kids eating habits.....
Kids happened and we cooked for them. When they hit the solid food stage, I would make a weeks' worth of baby food, using every pan and surface in the kitchen. Hubby would clean up the war zone. This was our teamwork to get this accomplished. With this, our kids ate the best, most local and homemade food. Hubby would come home post work when I was on leave and would cook the 2 of us a nice meal. We would shop at the farmers' market on Saturdays and make whatever looked good, with no real plan. Once I went back to work, I still let hubby do the dinner cooking. We'd peruse cookbooks, but with little ones abound, cooking together was a thing of the past. We'd eat when the kids went to bed after 7.
Then I stopped working and had to prepare meals for 3 (and then 4) kids 3 meals a day. There was no way with dad working and not home until 7 that the kids could get to bed by 7 without feeding them at 5. I had basic, staple meals I'd feed them. Sausage, gnocchi and broccoli was an example of this. When #4 developed chronic fluid in her ears, she had to go on baby solid food and I started to make her formula from scratch. The recipe was from the Nourishing Traditions cookbook by Sally Fallon. I'd separate the whey from the yogurt, purchased lactose and a zillion other things whipping this formula up 2 times a week. You see, the doctor wanted #4 on food and not formula. She needed to gain weight. But my life, the life of a mom with 3 other kids 5 and under could not sustain a baby that couldn't eat on the run. Hence the formula. She outgrew her ear issue and the formula. Now I had 4 kids eating the same meals.
Sounds simple, but we were still shopping for kids' food and parent meals as separate menus. We were not paying attention to cost. Most especially since we paid a lot by cash at the farmers' market, and charged our way everywhere else. Then one year, I recapped our spending and saw what we had spent at our local Whole Foods Market. Yes we are a family of 6, but ignorance is no excuse. We also were buying prepared foods from Three Stone Hearth. It was cooked food that just needed heating up, made the way we'd make dinner so long ago. Saving time had a price and we had to cut back. We also had to cut back eating out. When I was pregnant, we'd do takeout a couple of times a week. We replaced it with the Three Stone Hearth, but it was starting to add up. When the 6 of us eat in a restaurant, it was totaling close to $100. Yikes.
At about that time, I came across a 13 week meal planning cookbook Supper's on the Table, Come Home by Rachel Masters. 13 weeks of home cooked meals including shopping lists. The food was simple and quick including vegetables, entree and a starch. There was a bit too much condensed soup, velveeta and religion interspersed in the recipes and book for my taste, but I managed to substitute and ignore what I didn't want. We cooked through the entire 13 weeks along with a friend who did the same week by week. We'd compare notes and laugh at our mis-steps. I often missed the parts that said something needed to cook in the crock-pot all day or should be started at 4, not 5:30 to marinade or some silly other little detail. The beauty of this process was that every week I knew what I needed to purchase to make 5 good meals. We'd end up with left overs and an impromptu dinner out here or there. The other great thing was that I started eating with the kids. Due to extra curricular activities, the kids were staying up a tad later, so they were eating at a more normal adult time. Hubby would make it home eventually and join us in progress or reheat. The kids started to have some favorite meals.
I'd never been able to figure out how my mom had made family dinners every night with all of us eating together. This is probably partially because I don't necessarily remember when I was little, like my kids' ages. She cooked awesome meals for us with variety and love. I was on the verge.
Once the 13 weeks were up my friend and I decided to make our own 13 weeks. We called it our cookbook adventure. We sifted through years and years of collected recipes torn out of papers and magazines. We threw out all of the ones that took longer than an hour to prepare and sorted the keepers into meat types, side dishes, vegetables and soups. We planned 13 weeks of variety with 5 meals a week. We varied the meats and types of meals, trying to include a crock-pot dish per week. There was less usage of condensed soup and no velveeta. We copied and spiral bound the collection. Since these recipes were untested, it was an adventure for sure.
This led my friend and I to create our own 3-ring binders of recipes that worked for our families. Armed with a box of sheet protectors, I pulled all of our family favorites into this binder. It is now separated by meat, rice, pasta, soups, breakfasts, snacks and desserts. I've been known to let the kids peruse the book and pick a recipe for the coming week. This gave at least one kid per meal ownership of what we were having.
At the same time, I began budgeting our groceries for the first time ever. I tracked for years our spending, but never recapped it. I looked back on all of our spending and picked a weekly average number. This amount included eating out and everything but cash spending that had been recorded in our tracking. Each week, on Sunday, we'd pick out 5 nights of meals from the book. Well, it wasn't just from the book. I follow several food blogs (smitten kitchen, lynns kitchen adventures and dinner a love story) and print out recipes I see that look like they'd fit for us. I swing those into our weeks and the ones we like move to the binder. I've even taken to printing on 3-hole punched paper to bypass the sheet protector step.
Things I've learned are that planning one meal as a family is infinitely easier and less expensive than separate kid meals. It also provides less wasted food. Shopping farmers' markets gives us the freshest food possible and enables us to carry meals over to the next week if we don't eat 5 meals. It has simplified our shopping, making it more efficient. I've also learned that we can do more with less. I've cut our budget by 20% and am now trying to squeeze it down another 5-10%. This is without sacrificing quantity or quality.
...to be continued with further conversation about kids eating habits.....
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
2010 recap
All these recaps of last year pushed me to give you an update of some of my blog posts from last year..... Also, I've been wanting to revisit some of them with new statuses but am not savvy enough in blogging to post changes.
Bunks: We are all back to our own space. #1 in his own room and all 3 girls together. We disassembled #1's bunk bed into 2 single beds. We thought the illusion of the 2nd bed could double for the sofa request. No such luck. We're still looking for a solution for his room without being too and maintaining a creative flair. Each of the girls has gotten to personalize their bed with new linens, compliments of Grandma and Grandpa for Hanukkah. We're trying to accessorize to bring their choices together.
Sugar: We still have 1 gallon bags of "new" candy from Halloween in the freezer per child. #1 was motivated with M&Ms by his tutor and raw chocolate by his therapist. It's crazy how it makes his world go round and him so much more amenable. We have stopped allowing yogurt past after school snacks. With 20+ grams of sugar per serving, it was doing us a disservice. Now, fruit only after dinner. We still do donuts on Sundays before Sunday school. The go all sugared up, but then it's God's problem, right? The tough part is that Mom (I) am temporarily/possibly permanently gluten free. No donuts for me.
Schedules: We had #2 choose 2 of 3 seasonal sports to compliment the year-round taekwondo. Since she and her brother are within striking distance of their black belts, we wanted to focus only on it for a season. I am still torn with requests and interests of/by my children, friends and parents. Just today we were swayed into signing up for winter indoor soccer. My basic thought on this league is that it is expensive ($165-$190) for the short game only season. It's in small cramped gyms where it is hard to be a spectator. #3's dear friend and amazing coach pretty much begged and stalked us today to get us to sign up. Because we love her and him, we waffled and as soon as we can figure out how to get the late fee waived, will be signing up. Oh, the games are Sunday. Ugh, now we are paying for Sunday school and not going. Pfew, only 2 games have conflicts. Topic for the future is summer camp and camps in general....
Freedom: Not only did we let #1 go to practice twice a week with friends, but we are now having all 3 big kids come home by themselves 3+ times a week. The caveat is that #3 is always accompanied. #1 and #2 alternate who "has" to go with #3. We make sure in the morning that the wheels match up, meaning that if someone is on a bike, something similar in speed is with the partner. This plan has received concern based on situations in areas not our own. There have been abduction attempts near my folks, but I cannot let those deter my plan to give my kids some freedom. It is freedom that is not unplanned or unworried. There is no playing after school or on the way. I am home waiting 95% of the time. They do not have phones and can call from school before they head home if there is a problem. We have not had any problems. Future post is still going to be cell phones with kids.
Buckle up: #4 is now our only child in a booster seat. Funnily enough, when she is not in the car, #3 likes to sit in her booster. I guess it is always better when it is someone else's. #1 is now allowed to sit in the front seat for non-freeway trips. We've decided that the speed for these in town trips is low and the seatbelt isn't choking him.
Choices: Our same friends have had us over. Some others have asked us for help. Some Tuesdays I take 8 kids to school. Some other days, my neighbors take portions of my kids to school. We recently suspended our annual holiday party, but were able to pull-off a new year's chile-fest. Again, choices. #1 wants to go to sleep away, mucho expensive camp this summer. We are in conversations...no birthday party/present, etc... choices..
Health: A few runny noses, but no major illnesses. #1 is now taking vitamin D and all vitamins are self-serve on the table. #4 has to be monitored so she doesn't take too many, they're like candy to her. So, cod liver oil, sambucol (elderberry), vitamin D, a probiotic and enzyme are on the vitamin train. No flu shots and other than a suspected but negative case of whooping cough, we are healthy! We tried switching out gluten bread for non with a revolt. Now cinnamon bread is only for the weekends.....
Volunteering: Still a believer, still helping out in the class. On a bond oversight committee and working on neighborhood projects and saying no to everything else of the volunteer type.
Praise: I have been better, but not perfect. It's not easy to not react. It's not easy to connect without conflict. I keep trying to improve and communicate. It's all a mother can do, along with paying for therapy....
Gamey: No, Hanukkah did not warrant us an iPod touch for #3 or an x-box blah blah blah for #1. Boy have they been haranguing. I still don't see the benefit since we don't have time for the things we do have.
Charity: Same as before. Only cranky part was the in-class giving. Hanukkah was way early this year. We were done and gone with our in house part. 2 weeks later was the school portion. How crazy and time consuming. It all adds up. We ended up giving within the school to needy people we have never met, but couldn't give to people who have helped us throughout the year. We'll find a way for balance, somehow.
Piercing: I've heard we've inspired some friends to "let" their daughter get their ear pierced. Other friends have seen our place of choice and rejoiced. So far so good all of our recent piercings are healthy. We have slacked off on our cleaning regime. It's been a month, I feel like we're out of the danger zone. One more month to go and then we'll be hearing clamoring about more earrings. The girls are vying for some of my earrings. Uh-oh.
Planning: Oops, I forgot to look at the assignment packet that was given to #3 the week before break. Yikes, 3 big things due along with normal stuff, the first week back. Not a good mix with cranky kids who don't want to go back to school. We will find a way.
Bunks: We are all back to our own space. #1 in his own room and all 3 girls together. We disassembled #1's bunk bed into 2 single beds. We thought the illusion of the 2nd bed could double for the sofa request. No such luck. We're still looking for a solution for his room without being too and maintaining a creative flair. Each of the girls has gotten to personalize their bed with new linens, compliments of Grandma and Grandpa for Hanukkah. We're trying to accessorize to bring their choices together.
Sugar: We still have 1 gallon bags of "new" candy from Halloween in the freezer per child. #1 was motivated with M&Ms by his tutor and raw chocolate by his therapist. It's crazy how it makes his world go round and him so much more amenable. We have stopped allowing yogurt past after school snacks. With 20+ grams of sugar per serving, it was doing us a disservice. Now, fruit only after dinner. We still do donuts on Sundays before Sunday school. The go all sugared up, but then it's God's problem, right? The tough part is that Mom (I) am temporarily/possibly permanently gluten free. No donuts for me.
Schedules: We had #2 choose 2 of 3 seasonal sports to compliment the year-round taekwondo. Since she and her brother are within striking distance of their black belts, we wanted to focus only on it for a season. I am still torn with requests and interests of/by my children, friends and parents. Just today we were swayed into signing up for winter indoor soccer. My basic thought on this league is that it is expensive ($165-$190) for the short game only season. It's in small cramped gyms where it is hard to be a spectator. #3's dear friend and amazing coach pretty much begged and stalked us today to get us to sign up. Because we love her and him, we waffled and as soon as we can figure out how to get the late fee waived, will be signing up. Oh, the games are Sunday. Ugh, now we are paying for Sunday school and not going. Pfew, only 2 games have conflicts. Topic for the future is summer camp and camps in general....
Freedom: Not only did we let #1 go to practice twice a week with friends, but we are now having all 3 big kids come home by themselves 3+ times a week. The caveat is that #3 is always accompanied. #1 and #2 alternate who "has" to go with #3. We make sure in the morning that the wheels match up, meaning that if someone is on a bike, something similar in speed is with the partner. This plan has received concern based on situations in areas not our own. There have been abduction attempts near my folks, but I cannot let those deter my plan to give my kids some freedom. It is freedom that is not unplanned or unworried. There is no playing after school or on the way. I am home waiting 95% of the time. They do not have phones and can call from school before they head home if there is a problem. We have not had any problems. Future post is still going to be cell phones with kids.
Buckle up: #4 is now our only child in a booster seat. Funnily enough, when she is not in the car, #3 likes to sit in her booster. I guess it is always better when it is someone else's. #1 is now allowed to sit in the front seat for non-freeway trips. We've decided that the speed for these in town trips is low and the seatbelt isn't choking him.
Choices: Our same friends have had us over. Some others have asked us for help. Some Tuesdays I take 8 kids to school. Some other days, my neighbors take portions of my kids to school. We recently suspended our annual holiday party, but were able to pull-off a new year's chile-fest. Again, choices. #1 wants to go to sleep away, mucho expensive camp this summer. We are in conversations...no birthday party/present, etc... choices..
Health: A few runny noses, but no major illnesses. #1 is now taking vitamin D and all vitamins are self-serve on the table. #4 has to be monitored so she doesn't take too many, they're like candy to her. So, cod liver oil, sambucol (elderberry), vitamin D, a probiotic and enzyme are on the vitamin train. No flu shots and other than a suspected but negative case of whooping cough, we are healthy! We tried switching out gluten bread for non with a revolt. Now cinnamon bread is only for the weekends.....
Volunteering: Still a believer, still helping out in the class. On a bond oversight committee and working on neighborhood projects and saying no to everything else of the volunteer type.
Praise: I have been better, but not perfect. It's not easy to not react. It's not easy to connect without conflict. I keep trying to improve and communicate. It's all a mother can do, along with paying for therapy....
Gamey: No, Hanukkah did not warrant us an iPod touch for #3 or an x-box blah blah blah for #1. Boy have they been haranguing. I still don't see the benefit since we don't have time for the things we do have.
Charity: Same as before. Only cranky part was the in-class giving. Hanukkah was way early this year. We were done and gone with our in house part. 2 weeks later was the school portion. How crazy and time consuming. It all adds up. We ended up giving within the school to needy people we have never met, but couldn't give to people who have helped us throughout the year. We'll find a way for balance, somehow.
Piercing: I've heard we've inspired some friends to "let" their daughter get their ear pierced. Other friends have seen our place of choice and rejoiced. So far so good all of our recent piercings are healthy. We have slacked off on our cleaning regime. It's been a month, I feel like we're out of the danger zone. One more month to go and then we'll be hearing clamoring about more earrings. The girls are vying for some of my earrings. Uh-oh.
Planning: Oops, I forgot to look at the assignment packet that was given to #3 the week before break. Yikes, 3 big things due along with normal stuff, the first week back. Not a good mix with cranky kids who don't want to go back to school. We will find a way.
Saturday, October 9, 2010
L'chaim-to your health
With our first runny nose/cold upon us I thought I'd put a post up about what we do to stay healthy. First off, note that it is the child who sucks her thumb that has the cold. I have found that my kids who suck/ed their thumb get more colds than my other kids. Even with this, I feel that my family has less colds/illnesses than average.
What do we do? I believe that less processed and more whole grain is better. We do not use anti-bacterial soaps. We do (well, really the kids do) drink whole milk. We shop first at the farmers' market for meat, fruits and vegetables and have our milk delivered from a local organic dairy. We believe that food that has touched less hands and miles will be fresher and have less problems. Our meat is grass fed and so are our milk and eggs. This means that the vitamin D that is from the sun is in our milk, butter, meat and eggs. With the vitamin D in food we eat, we get vitamin D. Yes, all of this food costs more.
We eliminated processed cereal. Even whole grain that has been extruded into the cute shapes. My kids miss this, but haven't gone hungry. We initially switched to bagels and granola cereal and then to warm rice cereal that can be cooked in 6 minutes. My original thinking was that less processed was healthier. It has turned out to be cheaper too.
We also supplement with cod liver oil and elderberry. In the past, I put one teaspoon of Nordic Naturals cod liver oil in juice and had my kids drink that. It was the only way they received juice. I was not very consistent with this, but tried. The elderberry came in liquid format of Sambucol. My girls all took a teaspoon of that very easily. Because it is elderberry and it has the word "berry" in it, my anti-fruit/vegetable son refused.
What we do now is have the kids vitamins on the table. I buy the chewy cod liver oil vitamins at Costco (32mg DHA/4mg EPA), of which my picky son will eat (only yellow ones though). I also have Nordic Naturals in capsule format (375mg DHA/246mg EPA). This brand was recommend to me by an anthrosophophic doctor we were seeing. When #4 was 6 months old, she was very underweight and behind in motor skill development. We put cod liver oil in everything she ate. She now doesn't even notice its flavor in food. It has a high level of nutrients compared to the other brands (as you can see comparing the 2 different ones above) and is pretty pure in how it is made. We've also switched to capsule format in our elderberry and chewables. Gaia is the brand of capsules with 800mg of sambucus and Solaray for the chewables with 400mg of sambucus. Elderberry/sambucus can be taken 2 a day and then up to four times a day if a cold is coming or sets in.
I now leave the vitamins on the table and the kids all serve themselves. This takes mommy remembering out of the equation. I have taken the Nordic Naturals capsules and can taste them after. Yuck, but don't tell my kids. I found Metagenics EPA-DHA Extra Strength. They are enteric coated and smell like vanilla. They have 400mg of DHA and 600mg of EPA with no nasty after-taste.
This isn't free, but I'd pay a bit for healthy kids. It keeps us out of the doctor's office and in school. It keeps me from feeling guilty when I want to take them out of school for fun things. I will also say that we choose to not have the flu shot in our family. Other than when I was pregnant with #1, none of us have had the flu (knock on wood or whatever will keep that statement true).
What do we do? I believe that less processed and more whole grain is better. We do not use anti-bacterial soaps. We do (well, really the kids do) drink whole milk. We shop first at the farmers' market for meat, fruits and vegetables and have our milk delivered from a local organic dairy. We believe that food that has touched less hands and miles will be fresher and have less problems. Our meat is grass fed and so are our milk and eggs. This means that the vitamin D that is from the sun is in our milk, butter, meat and eggs. With the vitamin D in food we eat, we get vitamin D. Yes, all of this food costs more.
We eliminated processed cereal. Even whole grain that has been extruded into the cute shapes. My kids miss this, but haven't gone hungry. We initially switched to bagels and granola cereal and then to warm rice cereal that can be cooked in 6 minutes. My original thinking was that less processed was healthier. It has turned out to be cheaper too.
We also supplement with cod liver oil and elderberry. In the past, I put one teaspoon of Nordic Naturals cod liver oil in juice and had my kids drink that. It was the only way they received juice. I was not very consistent with this, but tried. The elderberry came in liquid format of Sambucol. My girls all took a teaspoon of that very easily. Because it is elderberry and it has the word "berry" in it, my anti-fruit/vegetable son refused.
What we do now is have the kids vitamins on the table. I buy the chewy cod liver oil vitamins at Costco (32mg DHA/4mg EPA), of which my picky son will eat (only yellow ones though). I also have Nordic Naturals in capsule format (375mg DHA/246mg EPA). This brand was recommend to me by an anthrosophophic doctor we were seeing. When #4 was 6 months old, she was very underweight and behind in motor skill development. We put cod liver oil in everything she ate. She now doesn't even notice its flavor in food. It has a high level of nutrients compared to the other brands (as you can see comparing the 2 different ones above) and is pretty pure in how it is made. We've also switched to capsule format in our elderberry and chewables. Gaia is the brand of capsules with 800mg of sambucus and Solaray for the chewables with 400mg of sambucus. Elderberry/sambucus can be taken 2 a day and then up to four times a day if a cold is coming or sets in.
I now leave the vitamins on the table and the kids all serve themselves. This takes mommy remembering out of the equation. I have taken the Nordic Naturals capsules and can taste them after. Yuck, but don't tell my kids. I found Metagenics EPA-DHA Extra Strength. They are enteric coated and smell like vanilla. They have 400mg of DHA and 600mg of EPA with no nasty after-taste.
This isn't free, but I'd pay a bit for healthy kids. It keeps us out of the doctor's office and in school. It keeps me from feeling guilty when I want to take them out of school for fun things. I will also say that we choose to not have the flu shot in our family. Other than when I was pregnant with #1, none of us have had the flu (knock on wood or whatever will keep that statement true).
Monday, August 16, 2010
sugar
I should have known I was in trouble when #1, in preschool, stated on his "person of the week" full body drawing stated that SUGAR was his favorite food. How did my then four year old pick something that was barely available to him? My family elders thought I was such a stingy mom because my kids didn't have even ice cream until they were at least 1. Their 1st birthday cake was often the first sugar they tasted (at least for the 1st and probably the second).
It's all my fault. When pregnant, I craved sugar. Yes, it is horrible for you in general, but when pregnant, it is worse. It was nothing but trouble for me and my loosening joints and back. That did not stop me from eating it. Home-baked cookies were my favorite. Oh and movie candy, even if I wasn't going to the movies.
I don't even let my kids drink juice. Juice is sugar. We had friends over. One of the moms asked for juice for their kid. I said that my kids don't get juice without cod-liver oil in it. You couldn't pay me to drink that, but it worked. They used to think lemonade was water with 1/2 of lemon squeezed into it.
This year we went to a couple of functions where soda was free flowing for the kids. I let them have it, but not caffeinated ones. I had friends who did not restrict their kids intake. Their rationale was why stress out when it isn't every day. Enjoy the party and let them enjoy themselves too. If it means soda and even caffeinated soda, and cupcakes and so on, then go with it.
I also have a hard time not using sugar as a motivator. #1 was very overwhelmed with obligations of tutoring and such. Stopping for frozen yogurt or ice cream made life easier for all of us. His tutor even said it did not impact his work or attention. But, food and especially sugar, should not be a motivator. I am a bad mom. I have said that we can only go once a week for the yogurt/ice cream. Now we go to the drug or convenience store for a non-caffenated soda or candy.
Then baseball season came upon us. #1 was in the minors. Gatorade was free flowing. Yuck. I get how hard the kids are working and don't want them to get dehydrated on the rare hot day. The problem compounded with the snack shack at the games and 3 little sisters wanting what their brother had. All sugar intake must be fair, regardless of the size of the sibling. I finally had to buy the powder and make it at home for fear of going broke.
We try to have club soda or diet tonic water be substitutes, but it only gets us so far. We started making popped corn at home. Now I eat buckets of it. We've instituted a rule where #1, who HATES fruits and vegetables, had to eat a form of fruit or vegetable for breakfast and dinner or else he would not be able to partake in any potential sweets. I'm still a bad mom. Don't punish your kids with sugar.
We just went to a wedding where sugar was readily available for the kids. I decided to relax and have fun and not worry about it. #1 drank 5 Izzys! Each kid had left with a full tummy of nothing but sugar and maybe a couple of bites of fries and mac-n-cheese. They all proclaimed that the wedding was the best event they had ever been to. We had fun too. They left with buckets full of candy and bags full of jellybeans. Our next day was 7 hours of driving. I decided to let them gorge themselves with hopes that they'd run out or make themselves sick and not want to eat anymore. It didn't work. They still have some left and didn't get sick. They were a bit wired after no exercise and all sugar, but it enabled us to only stop once for gas and twice for potty breaks. They were content. I'm going to regret this for sure.
Halloween is coming up again. I do not like this holiday. It ranks up there with Valentines day for me. Too much centered around sugar. I still have bags of the kids' trick-or-treating candy in the freezer. They get to freeze a large zip-lock bag of their bounty each year. It is doled out as treats at various times of the year. Surprisingly, I haven't raided the bags. Out of sight out of mind really works for me. The freezer in the garage is just far enough from my brain and food that I don't even think about it. I wish I could say the same about my kids. Oh well, at least I'll have something to pass out to trick-or-treaters this year without shopping for it.
What is the answer? Will they learn to self regulate? Will I stop feeling guilty? Who knows?
P.S. I predominantly shop at the farmers' market. I didn't want you to think I only feed my kids sugar. I'll post another time about our house food choices. This post was really about my kids' food choices.
It's all my fault. When pregnant, I craved sugar. Yes, it is horrible for you in general, but when pregnant, it is worse. It was nothing but trouble for me and my loosening joints and back. That did not stop me from eating it. Home-baked cookies were my favorite. Oh and movie candy, even if I wasn't going to the movies.
I don't even let my kids drink juice. Juice is sugar. We had friends over. One of the moms asked for juice for their kid. I said that my kids don't get juice without cod-liver oil in it. You couldn't pay me to drink that, but it worked. They used to think lemonade was water with 1/2 of lemon squeezed into it.
This year we went to a couple of functions where soda was free flowing for the kids. I let them have it, but not caffeinated ones. I had friends who did not restrict their kids intake. Their rationale was why stress out when it isn't every day. Enjoy the party and let them enjoy themselves too. If it means soda and even caffeinated soda, and cupcakes and so on, then go with it.
I also have a hard time not using sugar as a motivator. #1 was very overwhelmed with obligations of tutoring and such. Stopping for frozen yogurt or ice cream made life easier for all of us. His tutor even said it did not impact his work or attention. But, food and especially sugar, should not be a motivator. I am a bad mom. I have said that we can only go once a week for the yogurt/ice cream. Now we go to the drug or convenience store for a non-caffenated soda or candy.
Then baseball season came upon us. #1 was in the minors. Gatorade was free flowing. Yuck. I get how hard the kids are working and don't want them to get dehydrated on the rare hot day. The problem compounded with the snack shack at the games and 3 little sisters wanting what their brother had. All sugar intake must be fair, regardless of the size of the sibling. I finally had to buy the powder and make it at home for fear of going broke.
We try to have club soda or diet tonic water be substitutes, but it only gets us so far. We started making popped corn at home. Now I eat buckets of it. We've instituted a rule where #1, who HATES fruits and vegetables, had to eat a form of fruit or vegetable for breakfast and dinner or else he would not be able to partake in any potential sweets. I'm still a bad mom. Don't punish your kids with sugar.
We just went to a wedding where sugar was readily available for the kids. I decided to relax and have fun and not worry about it. #1 drank 5 Izzys! Each kid had left with a full tummy of nothing but sugar and maybe a couple of bites of fries and mac-n-cheese. They all proclaimed that the wedding was the best event they had ever been to. We had fun too. They left with buckets full of candy and bags full of jellybeans. Our next day was 7 hours of driving. I decided to let them gorge themselves with hopes that they'd run out or make themselves sick and not want to eat anymore. It didn't work. They still have some left and didn't get sick. They were a bit wired after no exercise and all sugar, but it enabled us to only stop once for gas and twice for potty breaks. They were content. I'm going to regret this for sure.
Halloween is coming up again. I do not like this holiday. It ranks up there with Valentines day for me. Too much centered around sugar. I still have bags of the kids' trick-or-treating candy in the freezer. They get to freeze a large zip-lock bag of their bounty each year. It is doled out as treats at various times of the year. Surprisingly, I haven't raided the bags. Out of sight out of mind really works for me. The freezer in the garage is just far enough from my brain and food that I don't even think about it. I wish I could say the same about my kids. Oh well, at least I'll have something to pass out to trick-or-treaters this year without shopping for it.
What is the answer? Will they learn to self regulate? Will I stop feeling guilty? Who knows?
P.S. I predominantly shop at the farmers' market. I didn't want you to think I only feed my kids sugar. I'll post another time about our house food choices. This post was really about my kids' food choices.
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